33

I like to look at my birthday every year how a lot of people look at New Year’s – a new year with a clean slate for me to do with it what I wish.

And I feel this year is no different.

I can’t say my 30’s have rocked in the traditional way. I feel like my body has failed me but from body failure so much has happened and yes I am thankful that all this crap happened/is happening when I was in my 30s – I am pretty sure if it happened when I was 25 I would have had a major melt down, wouldn’t have been able to see the silver lining and would have been drunk a lot more than I already was! And when I was 25 I didn’t have Eric.

SO my goals for my 33rd year:

1. Au revoir cancer – FOREVER

2. Start new postcard project (coming soon!!)

3. Take a kick a*s trip with Eric and Ian

4. Take a romantic get away with Eric – who is up for watching Ian?!?!

5. AND – this is a scary one but with the help of a friend, I am going put this blog-o into an e-book – there I said it…I am working on my f-in outline. I HATE OUTLINES! Don’t worry, I will save some juicy stuff just for the book – I can’t show all my cards on the blog!

6. Maybe stop using so many curse words?? Maybe…probably not. I don’t really curse this much in “real” life – sometimes

7. Continue to live life, enjoy it all, laugh, love, shine my light, help others, smile from my heart, see beauty in little things, and hug more – I need to hug more!

8. Write in my journal daily (already do – want to keep up)

9. Meditate/pray at least 20 minutes daily (again, already do)

10. Get out and sell my necklaces to boutiques

11. Send in my stuff to considered as a designer for a scrapbook company – why not…I need to scrapbook more and this would make me do it!

What have I learned thus far in life:

1. Finding love was 100% worth all the bullsh*t I went through with others. I grew from every relationship I had – I was just who I needed to be when I met Eric.

2. Tell people you love them….in person, on the phone, in a letter – I don’t care just do it often.

I just recently learned this – I would keep it to myself because I was scared they didn’t love me back, but now I don’t care – you don’t have to love me back for me to love you…ask Ian, I still kiss on him all the time even though he tells me, “mommy, you can’t kiss me forever” – wanna bet???

3. Listen to your heart. More than likely any question you have, your heart has already told you the answer – now it might not be the answer you actually want to hear but it is THE answer. Your heart speaks very quietly but has the loudest message

4. Being a stay at home mommy is hard but worth it all. It doesn’t pay well in terms of money but that is easy to get over when you get daily jokes, dances just to make me laugh, a few hugs and kisses, art work, laughter, songs, constant why’s, a few balls thrown at your head, playing hide and seek and SO much more

5. When someone repeatedly shows up in your life – take notice. God has put them there for a reason. Gina and I constantly ran into each other, she claims she noticed me walking Ian while I was bald the first go around and thought to herself – she could a friend (now of course I have to tell her yea right – you were scared of catching what I had!) anyway, God was trying to get us two together for some time before we let ourselves go into complete friendship – now, this train is rollin’

6. If you look around, your problems really aren’t THAT bad. Someone always has it worse than you. And when you help others, your problems just seem to disappear

7. Love is a powerful thing and can get us through a lot

8. Not to take myself so seriously. This is a hard one but so important. I want to be perfect in what I do, I want such and such to be perfect but I am learning – it doesn’t matter. Really, none of it matters. Taking time to listen to yourself/your heart, talk with God, love your family and friends, help others, look at the beauty in nature and all around us – now that is what matters

9. Take it all one step at a time. I was listening to a Wayne Dyer cd the other day and he summed it up so nicely. When he sits down to write a book – he doesn’t look at the 300 hundred pages it needs to be – he looks at the chapters and focuses on one at a time. And trying not to smoke/drink/eat sugar – whatever, don’t look at it for life – look at it for today. Today I won’t eat sugar, today I won’t smoke/drink – it is amazes what you can do for a day

10. Holding on the past of unforgiven stuff is like holding on an old bag of nasty food. It doesn’t hurt anyone but you, it doesn’t stink up the other person’s life and it takes up so much time and effort to hold it out from you so it doesn’t touch you – throw the crap away already.

11. Count your blessing every day. Say thank you to God for all the wonderfulness you have in your life.

So, here is to my 33rd birthday. I couldn’t ask for more – family, friends, love, joy, laughter, heart, happiness – my cup does run over.

Love to you.